My sweet angel

My sweet angel

Thursday, July 14, 2016

Even the Best Fall Down Sometimes

I heard this song today.  It reminded me of the past few days that have been the worst since I was diagnosed myself.  In fact, they are about equal.

"I'm open, you're closed
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face
Light up again

Even the best fall down sometimes" - Howie Day

Although I know, I will see your face light up again, but I'm not sure when.  Roy Reynolds AKA dada AKA Robertson gained his wings today.  Roy was the kind of person whose smile could wipe away all of your worries.  He was so silly and loved to debate with me over so many things.

When he got diagnosed with leukemia over a year ago.  I went to the hospital almost every day to sit with him.  He didn't want to believe he had cancer.  He was in such denial.  Every day, I tried to drill it into his head.  That's the thing about Roy, he could be stubborn.

Shortly after being released, he moved in across the street from us.  Karley and Livi absolutely adored him.  He was the best tenant and friend anyone could ask for.  He was always helping us and never asked for anything in return.  I was blessed to work with Roy and be his friend for several years.

When he got leukemia, we held a fundraiser for him at Ocean Lodge.  He didn't realize how tired the medicine would make him or the side effects that took place.  He hated them.  He didn't want to really grasp that he was going to be on this medicine forever.   I told him again and again he was my cancer buddy down here and he had to keep the medicine going.

Yesterday morning his sister, Renesha and I took him to the ER for pain.  He had been to the ER several days in a row and they wouldn't admit him.  His gums were bleeding, his nose had been bleeding, and the pain was almost unbearable.

After the ER where he was just given more pain meds and released, Roy and I went to Wendy's.  He, being Roy, tried to pay for my lunch.  I threw his money back at him and told him, "Next time I have to go to the hospital and you have to take me, you can buy me lunch".  With that perfect smile he just laughed and thanked me.

I dropped him off at his house at 12:45, we told each other we loved each other like normal, we knew cancer.  Those were the last words we ever said to each other.

I arrived home around 6 p.m. last evening.  A family friend had found him unresponsive at his home.  We called 911.  He looked at me once, closed his eyes, and I never saw him open them again.  I had no idea what was going on.  I put a pillow under his head and stroked his head telling him it would be okay.  I was so wrong.

The ambulance arrived and he was still unresponsive.  His pupils were normal on the scene, but something happened on the way to the hospital.  I feel so guilty.  I don't know how long he was laying there.  My friend  was laying right across the street, bleeding into his brain with no one to help him.

The hospital here decided the trauma to the brain was too extensive so they air lifted him to Savannah Memorial.  I spent the night in Savannah and went back this morning.  He had no brain activity.  It was decided to take him off life support.

This happened so quickly.  One minute one of my greatest friends down here is okay and the next he's gone.  The girls are devastated, his family and friends are devastated.  I hope he knew how much he was loved by all of us.  Roy was one of a kind, always willing to help someone, never holding ill will.  I really thought that he would live longer than me.  Once again, I was wrong.

Roy, I'm sorry I didn't check on you more.  I'm sorry for not being the friend I should have been.

Please pray for Renesha, his mom, his family, his children, and his friends.  The world lost a great one today, one of the best.  He can never be replaced and will always be in my heart.  Love you Robertson.






23 comments:

  1. May God strengthen and cover his family

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  2. God's got you in his hands it's hard on all who knew you but thank God we got to know you. Praying for the family love to each one.Blue & Rozell

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  3. God's got you in his hands it's hard on all who knew you but thank God we got to know you. Praying for the family love to each one.Blue & Rozell

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  4. Wow I can't believe it! I will keep this family in my prayers.

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  5. Wow I can't believe it! I will keep this family in my prayers.

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  6. I never knew you, however my heart goes out to your family friends. No more suffering and no more pain R.I.P

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  7. I never knew you, however my heart goes out to your family friends. No more suffering and no more pain R.I.P

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  8. I'm one of Renesha's friends. It sounds like you and Roy were two peas in a pod. What a wonderful friendship you shared. Please do not feel guilt, none of you could have known what was to happen. From my vantage point you were an amazing friend to Roy and you are both blessed to have had one another. It sounds like you were more than friends and more like family. God bless you. You are all in my thoughts and prayers. Much love.

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    1. Thank you! We debated a lot but we understood each other because of the common similar illness. I love Roy like a brother and would do anything to have him back. But he fought a good fight and I'm so glad he is no longer in pain. It's the ones that he left behind that are suffering the most

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  9. I never met u either....but I have heard a lot about u from Roy. I have known Roy for about 10 years. We weren't the kind of friends that spoke everyday because our lives were so different and he worked so much but I am so happy that u created this blog. I couldn't have described him an better. He is all u said he is and I am deeply hurt and shocked by this. It is the last thing I wanted or was ready 2 hear. But it is what it is. I have always thought Roy would have lived longer than most of us.
    My 3 year old daughter asked me yesterday why was I sad....I said because on of mommys friends died. She replied he didn't die mommy. Oh, how I wish that were true.
    Anyways thanks for sharing, just as u have stated I feel extremely blessed to have known Roy Reynolds. He was a happy, positive, giving, & loving friend. I will miss him and I will always LOVE him! 😂

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    1. Thank you so much. We all loved him. Our lives will never be the same without him here. But I know he didn't want the cancer. And now he's free.

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  10. I remember the last conversation we had and if I knew that I was never going to see you again I would of tried to come. I'm sorry my friend that I didn't make it their please forgive me. You always had a smile that lit up my heart. Rest on in heaven my love my friend my life, I'm going to miss you Roy...I pray for your family that God let them know you are OK in heaven and you are still smiling.

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  12. that was very useful post
    http://lungcancersymptomsx.com

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  13. I'm so sorry for your loss! May God wrap his arms around you and give you and your family peace.

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  14. May God continue to keep you strong. Your reads are so touching. Cancer runs in my family some gave won the fight and some have lost it. One thing I can say about them all THEY WERE STRONG. Rest easy Roy.

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  15. How i survived lungs cancer.
    I was diagnosed of lung cancer in 2011 and the doctor (oncologist), because i was a chronic smoker who started smoking from 16 and told me i had just two years to live that my lungs had been damaged, that even on the best medication i still had two years. I needed help because i was scared to die and i did chemotherapy, radiotherapy and it was unable to treat or help me. I coughed nearly every minute. In my death clock counting just 6 months remaining, if you knew me then i was good as dead because the cancer had eaten me up. My wife was fortunate enough to contact doctor Amber, a herbal doctor who came and treated me in our house using his medicine and that is how i was saved (where western medicine and methods failed), that was the greatest decision my wife had taken aside marrying me. Today i am totally fine without any symptoms of cancer, it was all confirmed by my oncologist that i am clean. Do not die in silence or rely only on western medicine herbal medicine is very effective. You can contact the doctor on (drambermurray@gmail.com) for more information about his treatment.

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  16. We are wishing you a speedy recovery and pray to god for giving you more strength to be as genuine as you are now. Once again best of luck. https://buyerlotinibonline.wordpress.com/

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